15 Ways to Be a Leader Today – or Any Day

Three years ago, one of my mentors was debating internally about how to handle a personnel situation. There were enough funds to employ one person. The performance of one worker was better overall, but the other worker often showed flashes of brilliance and was trusted more by his coworker. In the end, the decision was made to keep the one with flashes of brilliance. After all, in my mentor’s words, “followers are easily replaceable, leaders are not. "Ever since that day, I’ve thought a lot about what makes a leader. The person with flashes of brilliance clearly wasn’t a leader in the traditional sense – he was at the bottom of the pecking order. Yet he clearly was a leader in the more important sense. Other people trusted him and often turned to him when they needed help. He also was able to step up his game when it was needed the most. Thus, he became much more vital to the organization than the steady, quiet employee who kept to himself.What does it mean to really be a leader? It doesn’t mean having a title – that’s often just the result of already being a leader. It means being the person people rely on in a tough situation. It means being the person that steps up when it’s needed. It means being the person that gets people going on the things they need to do. It means getting the things done that you need to get done as well. A leader with strong skills to back it up is indispensable to any organization. Here are fifteen ways you can start to become a leader in your own organization and make yourself more valuable there – even if you’re a quiet person who’d prefer to just get his or her work done. Speak up at meetings.

1.If you have a genuine concern or a good idea in a meeting, speak up and voice it. Why? Quite often, your very concern or idea is in the mind of a lot of others around the room, only they’re afraid to speak up. By speaking up, you’re essentially giving their thoughts a voice without that risk. You’re being a leader for that group of people with that idea.I’ve found that time and time again, when I do this, people will come up to me afterwards and say, “Thanks for saying that!” Right there, our relationship is stronger and they now look to me a little more than they did before. In at least one case I can think of, it led to a surprisingly strong working relationship. Cut out the negative talk.
2.Talking negatively about others behind their backs does very little to help you. You might get the quick rush of feeling good from the ability to make yourself feel superior to the other person, but over the long run, you’ll have a very negative reputation outside of your tightest associates. If you don’t have anything good to say, don’t say it – it will damage the amount that people trust you. Plus, do you think people are saying similar things about you behind your back? How do you think that affects your reputation? A good tactic is a simple one – don’t run away from negative talk and don’t repeat it at all, but don’t contribute to it. Just ignore it and see it for what it is – usually jealousy on some level.Offer up some positive talk, instead. My tactic is to usually be quiet when people are being disparaged, but speak up quite a bit when the conversation is more positive. Making positive statements about others (and doing it consistently) does nothing but improve your reputation. Keep it to the realistic things, though – don’t just blindly compliment people.
3.Volunteer for the tasks everyone’s afraid to volunteer for. Whenever a major task comes up that bears some serious responsibility and others are afraid to step up, step up. As with speaking up, by doing so, you effectively become the leader of the people who are interested but are too timid to volunteer themselves. You can take these people and channel them into being a part of the project. In a workplace where people meet regularly and collaborate on projects, it’s often quickly clear if certain people are struggling or having problems. Quite often, these people are left to flounder by others who are too “busy” to deal with it, but by spending some time to find out what the real problem is, you’re often throwing this person a life raft which, if they climb aboard, can make them eternally respectful and supportive of you. When people are in trouble, that’s the time to approach them, find out what’s wrong, and find out if you can help without greatly upsetting your own boat.
4.Directly compliment impressive work. Everyone loves recognition and compliments and usually retain positive feelings towards the people who give recognition and deserved compliments. That positive feeling can often be utilized later on when you’re in charge of a team they’re on.
5.Tell supervisors when their subordinates are doing well. This is a more indirect – but often more effective – method of the idea above. If someone does outstanding work, contact their supervisor and tell them. Face to face is often good, but even an email works for this purpose. Tell their supervisor exactly what the person did to go above and beyond the usual standard. This often results in an improvement in the workplace status for that person and, quite often, they end up realizing who offered up such compliments and recommendations.
6.Be willing and enthusiastic about team-based work. I used to be a workplace loner and avoid team-based work. Eventually, though, I learned that team-based work is the absolute best opportunity you ever have in the workplace to build strong relationships with the people around you. The more you participate in teams – and come through with your part of the puzzle while helping in little ways with the parts of others – the more others begin to see you as reliable and trustworthy. When you’re part of a team, take charge of it – but don’t be dictatorial. My approach is pretty simple. If I’m a part of a newly-formed team, I’ll step up immediately and brainstorm a plan, then send it to the others for consideration. Unless someone rips it to shreds, it usually more or less becomes the plan and I’m the de facto leader of the group. It’s for the same reason as above – you’re usually speaking for people who are too timid to speak up or offer a plan and they’re happy for you doing that if you’re not pushy about it. I would usually do something like send out a rough plan and say, “Here’s my idea for how we should tackle this. What do you all think?”
7.Make a point to remember – and celebrate – your coworker’s life milestones and accomplishments. One person I used to work with had a calendar he kept with everyone’s birthday in it along with their favorite two items from the vending machine. On their birthday, he’d go up to the vending machine, pop in $2, get their favorite soda and favorite snack, affix a bow (that he’d brought along with him) to the can, then stop by their desk and put them there, saying “Happy birthday!” with a big grin. It was small, but it came across as incredibly thoughtful – unsurprisingly, he was very well liked within the group and was often listened to and respected whenever he had any ideas or plans to share. Also unsurprisingly, he’s doing very well in life now.
8.Take two minutes to recognize the milestones and highlights in other’s lives. Keep track of them if you can. Find little ways to make everyone smile. Do these things and you’ll always win. If there’s a problem you can easily solve, solve it.Don’t worry about the political connotations or anything like that. If someone comes to you with a problem that you can completely solve or help solve without too much effort, just solve it. The more problems you solve, the more people look to you as a problem solver and the more they listen to your advice and what you have to say. Ask for help when you need it.Sometimes, you’ll need help. Some people are afraid to show weakness and avoid asking for help unless it’s absolutely vital. That’s nonsensical and inefficient. If there are particular elements that others can do much easier than you can, ask them for help (unless, of course, it’s a lot of additional work for them). This is the flip side of the coin from helping others whenever you can – if you’ve consistently helped others, they’re likely to help you. Suggest events that involve your coworkers. Be the person that rounds up a group to eat lunch together. Be involved in the planning of office parties – and even be the ringleader. Plan parties for people who are leaving. That doesn’t mean you have to do all the footwork, but develop the plan yourself. People will see you as a person who takes charge – and such events are simple to pull together if you just take a few minutes to do it.Offer useful, detailed feedback. In a busy world, it’s easy to just go “Looks good!” when someone wants feedback on something. Instead, take ten minutes and try to come up with three things that could be improved with the document. Preface it with a compliment on how good the project already is, put the three suggestions down as clearly and positively as possible, and finish up by saying something along the lines of wanting to turn something very good into something truly great. If the feedback is really worthwhile, they’ll again see you as someone to turn to when the chips are down. When asked for your opinion, be honest but don’t be cutting. Your honest feedback is much more valuable than being positive – but even if things are bad, you don’t have to be hurtful. I usually make an effort to compliment where I can, but if there are serious problems with what I’ve seen, I say so. Not saying so hurts them (since they present a poor product) and then, by association, hurts you (since you told them this poor product was good when it wound up dumping egg on their face).These small things, done every day, make you simultaneously indispensable in your workplace as well as a person people look to as a leader. Who do you think will have their name come up the next time promotions are discussed?

via thesimpledollar.com/

5 Ways to Become More Intelligent

Read Often
Do you realize that through reading you can learn in a few hours what took someone decades to learn? Reading not only informs, but it also increases your capacity for learning, thereby increasing your intelligence.
Although knowledge is not the summation of intelligence, it is the foundation of intelligence, so it’s crucial that we cultivate the joy of reading.
It’s an amazing thing, people who become successful write down how they did it, and then sell that information for a few dollars. For a few dollars and a few hours you can literally pick someone’s brain; you can buy a piece of their intelligence.
Reading gives you insight into great minds and sharpens your intellect. This allows you the ability to make greater logical connections because reading gives you more pieces of life’s puzzle. By reading from a multiplicity of sources, you gain the wisdom of many.

Teach Others
Teaching increases your capacity for reasoning, a critical aspect of intelligence.
Anyone who’s ever successfully taught anything realizes that teaching increases your capacity to reason. When you teach, you’re often required to view what you’re teaching from a variety of perspectives.
“I've always felt that a person's intelligence is directly reflected by the number of conflicting points of view he can entertain simultaneously on the same topic.”-Abigail Adams
When you teach, it’s often essential that you question what you believe in order to deal with objections and oppositions that are sure to arise. Teaching is often more beneficial to the teacher than the student.

Get Into Action
Action increases your capacity to understand a subject. As the old proverb goes, “In all thy getting, get understanding.”
You can have information, and you can teach what you know, but you will never fully understand a subject until you put it into practice. If you want to significantly increase your intelligence related to cooking, don’t just watch the Cooking Channel and don’t just tell someone how to cook; you must master cooking yourself by trying, failing, and perfecting the act of cooking.
You will always understand things better when you do them yourself. Knowledge gives you the pieces of the puzzle; understanding helps you put the puzzle together.

Master One Subject
Mastery is a sign of intelligence. Mastery comes from focusing on one subject until you fully understand it. If you can fully understand one subject, it will help you to better understand other subjects. In other words, mastery will increase your aptitude for grasping truths. If you can master playing the piano, you will better understand music in general.
Additionally, if you can master any subject, you will understand what it takes to succeed.

Watch More Television
You probably didn’t see this one coming.
By watching more television, you can become more “well-rounded.” Of course I’m not referring to watching more of the The Simpsons, I’m talking about watching television shows that offer an educational message such as political shows or shows on The Discovery Channel or The History Channel. These shows can increase your capacity for learning, reasoning, and understanding as long as you don't choose educational shows that also stress you out.
By putting these principles into practice on a consistent basis, you will begin to take on the characteristics of an intellectual. Your capacity to learn will be stretched, your reasoning skills will be utilized, your understanding will increase, and you will master at least one subject.

How to deal with criticism

The best way to grow is to take constructive criticism from people who have the skills and know-how that you're lacking.

• The key is separating the constructive from the unconstructive, and separating your self worth from the object of the constructive criticism.

The first thing you need to do is determine whether or not the person delivering the criticism is important to you. Do you value their opinion? Maybe they're your boss, and you need to take their criticism seriously in order to be successful. Maybe the person is well known as someone who thinks they're an expert, but just likes to shoot their mouth off. Even that last person can offer something valuable, but you definitely want to take their opinion with a few grains of salt compared to your boss.

Distill the important bits and use them to your benefit:

 

• Try to detach the criticism from the environment in which it was given. It's normal to be happy when praised or defensive when insulted, and it's normal to react accordingly, but you should also try to dispassionately look at what's being said and see if there are clues for your personal growth embedded in the praise or the vitriol. Pretend the person isn't talking about you, and try to read between the lines.

 

 

• Ask yourself: What part of this criticism is useful? Filter out the things that are actionable and repeatable from what can often be a lot of subjective opinion. This is where you listen and say "okay, that makes sense," or "I can come up with a plan to do that." Keep what's applicable to what you do and filter out the rest. Remember, haters going to hate, but even they sometimes hate for reasons worth considering.

 

 

• Write down those useful tidbits in your own words. Doing this removes the heightened emotion and lets you step back from the criticism, look at the it with clear eyes, and separate the advice from how you felt when you got it so you're more likely to act on it.

• Turn those tidbits into goals. Once you have specific, actionable tips, turn them into measurable to-dos.

• Adjust your attitude. You can do all of this and still get depressed when someone tells you how you can improve. Attitude is the key here, and if you don't push yourself to be more positive about the criticism you get, you'll always get depressed. Look at criticism as a chance to grow and get better—or even to surpass the person delivering the critique. It's easier said than done, but knowing your strengths and being ready to hear and accept your weaknesses is the most powerful thing you can do.

• When you know criticism is coming, do something you know you do well, and enjoy that feeling. Talk to someone who supports you, and can honestly tell you why you're good at what you do. Keep a work diary or a journal of awesomeness to remember why you rock, and then dive into the criticism, knowing that whatever you hear will only be fodder to help you rock harder. You can do it!

Is Meditation Really Beneficial, or Is It Just Ridiculous?

Thorin Klosowski PFollowOUnfollow3/08/13 10:00am 3/08/13 10:00amg 58,466Edit

I've seen you guys post a few things about the benefits of meditation, and I only have one question: Really? I'm pretty skeptical. Is there some actual science behind meditation benefits, or is this just one of those trends?

Sincerely,
Meditation Myths

Dear MM,
The meditation you've been hearing about isn't quite as stereotypical as you're probably thinking. And indeed, there is some science behind it: meditation has been a hot topic for all sorts of studies recently, and the supposed benefits range from jump-starting your productivity to improving your memory. Let's start by defining what meditation actually is, what the benefits are, and how you can implement it into your daily schedule.

What Meditation Really Is

If you see the word meditation and immediately conjure up religious images or deadbeats wasting time at work, you're not alone—but that's not exactly what we're talking about here. Mindful meditation, despite it's awkward name, is really just about training your brain to concentrate and focus better. As professor David Levy describes it to USA Today, meditation is just another exercise:

Meditation is a lot like doing reps at a gym. It strengthens your attention muscle.

That's it. You don't need to buy yoga pants, burn incense, or even sit a particular way. The purpose of meditation is to train your brain just like you do the rest of your muscles. In this case, that means concentrating and focusing on one thing in your brain for a little while. As The New York Times points out, it's about being mindful of what you're doing:

Though the concept originates in ancient Buddhist, Hindu and Chinese traditions, when it comes to experimental psychology, mindfulness is less about spirituality and more about concentration: the ability to quiet your mind, focus your attention on the present, and dismiss any distractions that come your way.

So, if you're struggling with concentration and focus, it's thought that meditation is one simple way to train yourself to get better at it. All it really takes is the ability to intentionally not think about anything for a little while. Photo by Chris Tweddle.

The Benefits of Meditation

It's long been thought that meditation plays some role in concentration and focus, but only recently have we started to see studies that actually reflect the common wisdom.

For example, one study from the University of Washington showed that meditation can increase productivity and help you focus, another study published in Brain Research Bulletin suggests meditation can decrease stress, and another by the University of Massachussetts Medical School has shown medidation can boost your overall brain power in a number of ways. Simply put, while researchers are still gathering evidence about the effects of meditation, it looks like even short stints of meditation have a positive effect on the brain's ability to concentrate. That in turn makes it easier to focus, retain memories, and be more productive.

On a more circumstantial level, meditation can also help you avoid information overload to help reduce the amount of noisy news around you all the time. Meditation is also helpful when you want to improve your powers of observation, or change habits and craving. Photo by Big Mind Zen Center.

How to Meditate

We've put together a guide to meditation before, and it's just as simple as it sounds. There really aren't any special tricks, magic incantations, or weird brain hacks. It's just about sitting quietly and concentrating for a while. The The Harvard Business Review has a meditation system we can all use:

Sit with your back straight enough that your breathing is comfortable—on a chair or a cushion on the floor—and set a timer for however many minutes you want to meditate. Once you start the timer, close your eyes, relax, and don't move except to breathe, until the timer goes off. Focus on your breath going in and out. Every time you have a thought or an urge, notice it and bring yourself back to your breath.

While a lot of the studies above dig into longer meditation periods, you don't need to dedicate that large of a chunk of time. two minutes a day is beneficial, and you can even use apps to help you calm down for those short periods of time no matter where you are.

So, while it might seem strange to you, take a few minutes everyday to just relax, clear your mind, and concentrate on your breathing. It's simple, doesn't take up that much of your day, and has been shown to have substantial benefits in all kinds of ways. If nothing else, it at least gets you away from your desk (and work) for a couple minutes. Photo by Richard Masoner / Cyclelicious.

Good luck,

How Can I Learn to Take Criticism Without Taking It Personally?

 

How Can I Learn to Take Criticism Without Taking It Personally?

 

Dear Lifehacker,
I'm awful at taking criticism. Whether it comes from other people or I'm judging myself, I take constructive criticism too personally. How can I learn to handle criticism without feeling so discouraged I don't want to try to get better?

Sincerely,
Why Bother

Dear Why Bother,
No one is good at everything, and few people are great at the first time they try something. You'll always have room to improve, no matter what you're doing, and the best way to grow is to take constructive criticism from people who have the skills and know-how that you're lacking. The key, however, is separating the constructive from the unconstructive, and separating your self worth from the object of the constructive criticism.

Dealing with Criticism from Others

Criticism from others can be difficult to take, especially if the person delivering the criticism isn't exactly subtle about it. The first thing you need to do is determine whether or not the person delivering the criticism is important to you. Do you value their opinion? Maybe they're your boss, and you need to take their criticism seriously in order to be successful. Maybe the person is well known as someone who thinks they're an expert, but just likes to shoot their mouth off. Even that last person can offer something valuable, but you definitely want to take their opinion with a few grains of salt compared to your boss. Photo by Everett Collection. (Shutterstock).

Once you've decided how important the person's opinion is, here are some ways you can distill the important bits and use them to your benefit:

• Try to detach the criticism from the environment in which it was given. It's normal to be happy when praised or defensive when insulted, and it's normal to react accordingly, but you should also try to dispassionately look at what's being said and see if there are clues for your personal growth embedded in the praise or the vitriol. Pretend the person isn't talking about you, and try to read between the lines.
• Ask yourself: What part of this criticism is useful? Filter out the things that are actionable and repeatable from what can often be a lot of subjective opinion. This is where you listen and say "okay, that makes sense," or "I can come up with a plan to do that." Keep what's applicable to what you do and filter out the rest. Remember, haters gonna hate, but even they sometimes hate for reasons worth considering.
• Write down those useful tidbits in your own words. Doing this removes the heightened emotion and lets you step back from the criticism, look at the it with clear eyes, and separate the advice from how you felt when you got it so you're more likely to act on it.
• Turn those tidbits into goals. Once you have specific, actionable tips, turn them into measurable to-dos. If someone complains that your writing is too long-winded, for example, set a to-do to trim the fat from your work after every writing session. If your boss complains you always wait until the last minute to complete tasks, set your due-dates a day earlier than they're really due, so you get to work sooner. Photo by John O'Nolan.
• Adjust your attitude. You can do all of this and still get depressed when someone tells you how you can improve. Attitude is the key here, and if you don't push yourself to be more positive about the criticism you get, you'll always get depressed. Look at criticism as a chance to grow and get better—or even to surpass the person delivering the critique. It's easier said than done, but knowing your strengths and being ready to hear and accept your weaknesses is the most powerful thing you can do.

Dealing with criticism from others is tough, but you have a choice about how to deal with it. It can be discouraging when your boss sends your work back to you with revisions and changes all over it, but those are your best opportunities to get better. Even when your boss spends your performance review praising you, don't forget to ask how you can improve—it's important to never let the opportunity for criticism pass you by. If you're not getting it, seek it out—doing so on your own lets you get it on your terms and in a positive environment.

Dealing with Self-Criticism

Dealing with the criticism we get from others is easy in comparison to how difficult it can be to deal with the ways we beat ourselves up. Those voices in your head that tell you that you'll never be any good at the thing you're learning, or that you shouldn't have gotten up this morning because nothing's working out? They're harder, but not impossible to deal with, and here's how:

• Remember, you don't have to listen. One of my favorite music and politics commentators, Jay Smooth of Ill Doctrine, describes those voices as your "little hater," and in the video here, he describes his own in a rhyme that reminds him—and us—that our little hater doesn't have to rule the day. The point here is that even when you can't hear anything but those voices, and you feel absolutely terrible about yourself, you still have the choice to listen to those voices and do nothing, or defy them and press on. Some days you'll feel like checking out, and that's fine, but if you can, whenever you can, it's important to put your little hater back in his place and remember that you're the one out here and he's the one in there.
• Ask yourself: Is that really you talking? Determine is whether or not you're beating yourself up for good reason, or being too hard on yourself. Are you actually the one doing the mental flogging, or are you depressed in general? Perhaps you're hearing the voices of other people who have told you over the years that you're not worth it. Stop, take a deep breath, and try to determine whether this is really you doing the critiquing, or you're just hating on yourself.
• Get away from it. Often we feel the worst about ourselves right after we get the criticism that triggers those voices in our heads. If you can, step back and away from the critique and do something else—preferably something you know how to do well that makes you feel good, and come back when you've calmed down and are ready to tackle the criticism.
• Ask a trusted friend or advisor. One quick way to determine whether you're being too hard on yourself is to ask a trusted friend—someone who cares enough to be honest with you and not just tell you what you want to hear. Share your thoughts and your work with them. Get their feedback on your self-criticisms. Often that voice in your head has a point, but it's covered in so much self-loathing that it's hard to distill. Photo by Andrew.
• Approach criticism from yourself the same way you would others. Write it down. Distill the good stuff from the nonsense your brain is shoveling. Make goals, and press on.

A point worth bringing up is that if those voices in your head—and we all have them—are consistently negative, always difficult to bear, and they impact your day to day life and relationships, you may actually be depressed. If those voice make things you used to love lose their luster, or make it difficult for you to do anything, it's worth talking to a professional about how you can cope and what you can do about it. Depression shouldn't be taken lightly.

Don't Take It So Personally

A lot of people will tell you to "stop taking it so personally," which is a pretty dismissive cop-out that minimizes how you feel. They mean well, but telling someone who's unhappy to just "be happy" isn't going to do any good. That said, attitude does count for a lot, and sometimes a good mood will give you the clarity of mind needed to handle criticism better. In some cases, that just means you need a dose of self-confidence, or a chance to do the things you're good at.

When you know criticism is coming, do something you know you do well, and enjoy that feeling. Talk to someone who supports you, and can honestly tell you why you're good at what you do. Keep a work diary or a journal of awesomeness to remember why you rock, and then dive into the criticism, knowing that whatever you hear will only be fodder to help you rock harder. You can do it!

Good luck,
Lifehacker